If you’re still knocking yourself out to get phone numbers, stop and think: what would you do with one if you got it anyway? What good would it do you? You’d call from your cellphone, and a bad connection would mean one or both of you would have to repeat what you’d said, or shout; a car horn would bleat and you’d have to try again; maybe you’d have to hang up and call back hoping for a better connection. Perhaps one or both of you is in a less than ideal location, so the entire conversation consists of shouting, instead of speaking in a sexy, enticing voice (“HEY! WOULD YOU LIKE TO GET TOGETHER FRIDAY NIGHT?” “WHAT?” “I SAID WOULD YOU LIKE TO GET TOGETHER FRIDAY NIGHT?” “I CAN’T HEAR YOU!” “I SAID WOULD YOU LIKE TO … OH, NEVER MIND; LET ME CALL YOU BACK; I’M ENTERING A TUNNEL!”).

This is not the way to court your intended. (This assumes you obtained a real phone number in the first place and not the number for Domino’s Pizza.)

There’s a better way; this is, after all, the 21st century. Ask for (or better yet, offer!) an email address. This way:

• correspondence can take place when it’s convenient for both of you;
• there are no awkward silences;
• there’s no stuttering while looking for exactly the right words;
• each of you can edit, edit, edit! There’s no “Oh, god! Did I really just say that?”;
• instead of “Gee, I don’t know where to go. Where do you want to go?” you have Yelp at your fingertips and can make several suggestions, which makes you look smart!;
• you can get to know each other further via email before that first date. Perhaps you can both save yourselves the trouble by discovering that a date isn’t a good idea after all, or better yet, you’ll learn that you have a lot of things to talk about on your date!

You’ll need a phone number for the actual date so that if one or the other of you is lost, late, or can’t find the other, then you can call, but before that? It can do more harm than good, being yelled at by a potential date who’s standing on a busy street corner, trying to be heard over car alarms and ambulances!